Thursday, August 19, 2010

What if the person you meet online wasn't who you expected at all?

Ok so after I graduated from high school in summer 2007, i got facebook since many college students use it. ok so I met this girl on it because she added me. We told each other jokes, stories, and chat. We seemed to have fun. Well we were anxious to meet since we are going to the same college. =) Anyways when I met her she was all dull and quiet. I talked and walked her to the humanities building. Later on I didn't follow her up the elevator and it seemed as tho she wanted me to join in but I didn't want to bother her. So I found out that she got mad over me not walking her to class... hey I walked her to the building and build the conversation the whole time... Shes still mad at me...and its been a week. What are your views of this friendship?

What if the person you meet online wasn't who you expected at all?
That is why I don't have a lot of faith in online-based relationships.





When you are able to spend time with a person face-to-face, all of the elements of spending time with a person allow you to have a good sense of who they are. The way you laugh, the way your voice makes inflections while talking, your facial expressions, gestures, reactions, etc are all cues as to how we have or don't have chemistry with another person.





It seems that after telling each other jokes, stories and being friendly online, you got the impression that she was like that in person. You see, people can be anyone they want to be over the internet. You then found out she wasn't like that, and that's actually normal.





I think it's rather lame for her to get mad because you didn't want to her class but you walked with her to the hall and tried to have a conversation-- it doesn't seem like anything fruitful will come of this relationship unfortunately.





Some people just don't have the social skills to interact out there in the real world, which is why facebook, myspace, the internet in general will never be a replacement for face-to-face relationships. That's why I based the quality of my friendships based on how often the other person wants to hang out in person instead of write on the stupid wall-- when I ask to hang out 3 times in a month and they refuse, but write on the stupid wall 10 times and invite me to stupid games, what does that say?





I don't think the friendship will amount to much at all. Move on and be glad that you didn't have romantic feelings.
Reply:I honestly feel people need to communicate with their words and not just treat you poorly or say their mad. If this gal has any substance she will talk to you and tell you whats wrong. I can suggest asking to talk to her and if she refuses I would look for some other friends. Hope this helps.
Reply:Talking online is easier than talking in person, You may not have been what she expected either, think about it this was like a first date, which everyone gets nervous on, maybe that was the reason for the being so quite. Give her another chance, there was something attractive about her, thats why you wanted to meet.
Reply:Well U have to understand some people are shy and being on the net u can be your self.. So just take it slow and try to get to know her in person..Good Luck
Reply:I don't know, maybe you should confront her about it.


She could just be a shy person.
Reply:Could it be she was shy when first meeting you?


Some people are like that even after you have shared a lot on line
Reply:People can be very different online than they are in person. I had this guy that was just a penpal but lived in a town near me, and after writing 6 months I wanted to meet him. I thought he was so amusing and funny on emails and chats, and in real life I thought him very boring and dull. You can't really know someone from being online with them. You have to be with them to find out if you really like them. My view of your friendship is that it didn't quite work out in real life. And the way she's acting towards you - leave it alone.
Reply:YOU SHOULD HAVE WALKED HER TO THE ELEVATOR! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? YOU ARE TO BE A GENTELMAN AT ALL TIMES! SO WHAT SHE WAS BORING AND DULL! DONT YOU THINK SHE MAY HAVE BEEN SHY ? HEY GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE.
Reply:well ppl are more talkative on the net than real life.


it's nothing surprising.


you should not expect online ppl to be the same as they are online.
Reply:People are different behind screen names, maybe she is shy and that is why she is more open when chattin on-line. Unfortunately, the computer allows people's true colors to manifest because there is no accountability, this is why i now believe that online dating is a waste of time.
Reply:sucks to be you=(


good luck/love ya/PEACE!
Reply:She wanted more, and you were not interested. It is often that people are not the same in person, as they are online. That is why I always say that you cn not fall in love with anyone until you actually get to know them in person. I see it happen so often. Best that you got to know her, and realized that she was not your type. Just act like a friend. If she can not accept that, then there is nothing that you can do.

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